Back to Old School

You know how we're all infiltrated with prom movies? Well, it's pretty much the same way with movies about going back to college. First, we are taught that life is not worth living after high school. Then, you might as well slit your wrists after college. That, or somehow go back to college. Go back to a way of life that is available to a person for a fragmented time period. Is it really THAT good? Casual sex, drinking, late night talks with roommates, pressure, being away from home. Okay, it IS. It is. You got me. But, why do the boy characters have such a monopoly on this type of movie? Girls get the proms--the weddings, and boys get the fun--the college. It hardly seems balanced, but there you have it. Okay, on to my review/comparison of two movies, one of which is stellar: Back to School and Old School.

Back to School is a 1980s Rodney Dangerfield vehicle. He's ugly; he's rude; he's ridiculous. And, of course, he's funny. No joke; he is. Rodney plays Thornton Melon, a rich guy who sees that his son is struggling at college. Even though Thornton has made big bucks, he never got a college education. Thornton comes to school, bunks in a dorm next to his son's, totally revamps it to look like a nice apartment, joins the diving team, and manages to hire famous authors and scientists to do his work for him. He romances the Literature professor and pisses off her lover. Thornton, threatened with the prospect of being thrown out of school, **SPOILER** finally starts doing his own work and, consequently, realizes his own worth. Back to School has funny moments; he has a secretary attend his class for him (and it's the secretary from Ferris Bueller's Day Off...priceless); he's falling asleep in the shower while he's studying books. There is also a sort of sad, sweet quality to the movie when Thornton figures out that his son is sort of a loser and not the big-time fraternity guy he told his dad he was.

Old School (2003) is another movie where the grown men go back to college in an effort to capture what they no longer have as married, career people. They don't attend classes, but start a fraternity for students and nonstudents for brotherhood and an overall excuse to party and live like they are 20 years old...you know, casual sex, drinking, drugs, fun. This movie, of course, stars younger guys in their 30s and the vibe is totally different than in Back to School. The men (Luke Wilson, the delicious Vince Vaughn, and Will Ferrell) have already been through school. They are looking to escape their lives. So, there's no real soul searching that takes place, if you don't count (and I don't) a badly cast Ellen Pompeo as a wet noodle love interest of Luke Wilson. That storyline is unnecessary and doesn't really work. She cannot hold a candle to Juliette Lewis, Luke Wilson's ex-girlfriend in the movie who plays a sexually-adventurous kind of gal.

Don't get me wrong; Old School is funny. I just think it's funny in a "dick-joke" sort of way, meaning it's really for boys to laugh at and for boys to understand more. I mean, they get laid, the girl characters are an after thought, and it's all about being in a suspended pubescent, teenage boy state. Like I said, there are funny parts, but it's all cliche and tired. Listen, both the movies are funny and they obviously play into the normal themes you'd find in any back-to-college movie. I just think that Back to School is a much better movie all around. Of course, there's adolescent humor and silly antics (Rodney Dangerfield's diving board stunt is kind of priceless), but it's not alienating to the girls or to not-hot guys like Old School is. I mean, Rodney Dangerfield was supremely ugly and he knew it. That self-deprecation was his greatest asset--both in his stand-up and in this movie. Plus, Back to School has so many great cameos--Robert Downey Jr. as the son's friend, the villain (Daniel's nemesis) from The Karate Kid as the villain, and--oh, yeah--Kurt Vonnegut. You'll have fun. And, don't worry, guys...you'll still see your share of naked girls. Thankfully, though, they won't be sleeping with Rodney.